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Saturday, November 22, 2008

dream, MILAB

I had a dream the other night that I was writing something on my computer. It was a letter to someone else but I used a racial slur - except that I spelled the racial slur wrong. The important part here is that throughout the dream I was filled with feelings. I had to let go of the slurs, I told myself, because that was why I had not attained avatarhood yet. -_- I know the point behind the dream, but damn if I want to shave my head and tattoo myself with a giant blue arrow. A department with the Council on High came forward to me 2 nights ago just as I had barely laid my head on the pillow. They didn't even wait for proper protocols, and the snot-nosed young ladies (about 18 years old and blond, was the leader... wearing red) plead that I reconsider the most recent firing of their department head. I had decided that person would be fired here in the waking world because, well, I am sick and tired of glory hounds and people who can't swallow that lump of fear or get over themselves long enough to get anything done. I told the little petitioners, when I realized why I was being annoyed in my waking waiting-to-go-to-sleep state, that the woman had my phone number. She had ways to show me she was serious. It had been months. If she could prove me otherwise, I'd reconsider. They went away without another word.... but I still had trouble falling asleep. Grrrr. When I finally fell asleep, I went places. Maybe physically like some abductee. Who can say. I was boarding the underground train and I had 2 male guards. I mistook them for Mike and Redwood. I was lucid enough to remember my daily life. I turned to the Mike guard and said, "I have to go to work now." Very brightly, because announcing it just seemed like the thing to do. "I beg your pardon?" the guy said. "I have to go to work now," I repeated, and then boarded the train car. I remember the sides of the train were grey, and inside the car was dark. I must have come home early, because later I was having a legitimate dream. I can't recall much of it. Something about a smoky grey cat.