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Monday, September 30, 2013

And the Rocks Cried Out (and Creeped Me Out)

I once went to one of those weekend spiritual gathers. I had hit a strange bout of insomnia before it so by the time I got to the gather I was pretty sleep deprived. I drove up from Florida, exploring along the way.

Two weeks of not sleeping. I was the first one to arrive. I stepped out of my car, put my left foot on earth at the spiritual grounds, and was greeted with a very loud "You're here!!!!" from everything nearby. It was like the rocks practically shouted. (No the rocks didn't shout.)

I spent the next several days being stared at and poked at by every spiritual anything in the area.

I couldn't go anywhere down a path without everything lining up along the side like they were watching the Queen of England go by. They grouped in sizes according to day, too, starting with the little folk and ending with tall ones that loomed over me like trees in the end. And the last few days were spent with me standing in the middle of the water hole as far from land as I could get while watching spiders, dozens and dozens of spiders, climb the rocks to try to get close to me. I mean I was inspected by *everything*.

I was kind of keeping to myself about it for a while. Even if I didn't think I was imagining it, there are just some things you get used to I guess? Getting stared at a lot, even if it had never been quite like that before. Then one of the volunteers, who had just got into voudoin and accepted her spirits into herself, tricked me into her camp to interrogate me all night long. It was like here we go talk talk talk, BTW what ARE you? Everything here is so excited to see you and I want to know what the hell is going on.

I never gave her a straight answer because I wasn't sure myself back then. I told her to ask them what the hell, and she said they're confused. They're saying they have never seen anything like you before. At the time I took that to be slightly disappointing (it would have been nice to know what they saw). I also felt and now even more realize, wait a minute. If they recognized me when I got there then why are they confused and wotnot? Something doesn't add up, unless volunteer was lying or being lied to.

And I don't remember most of the conversation at all. The only part that is clear is when I happened to look around into the night and saw one of the leaf elves off in a guarding position - which is what they do, and no I couldn't tell you what kind of alien they are or what they are - and then it took a draft on a cigarette. My mind was utterly blown, and I went off at the volunteer for a while freaking out because this elf wasn't being all Tolkien at me. It was smoking a cigarette while eavesdropping from about a dozen or more feet away, and that was just so... mortal.

After the talk, the peeping died down (although the spiders did have to take their shot and did) and then the gather was over. I forget where up North it was. I can't remember but I think that was also the year I was given that dream by Hubbard or whichever writer that was.

I was driving home and was just north of Kingsland, Georgia when it hit me while crossing over a bridge. Someone had decided to pull me out of body. It was so strong I couldn't fight it. I pulled over just in time at the bottom edge of the little bridge onto the grass and passed out.

I opened my eyes in the middle of a ritual fire pit and looked up while the volunteer, the gather leader, and a third man stared at me. I can't tell if you if they tried commands or what they were after. I can only tell you it almost killed me.

I woke up in a few hours and went on home. Confronted the leader about it but he denied it indirectly.

I also believe one of the group members who had died just before the gather was using me to channel. I kept hounding this one girl to say things to her even though I didn't know her (she was close to him), and I couldn't control these feelings of abandonment and being left out when people did things like a memorial and I wasn't invited because I didn't know the dragon. Things just kept coming out of my mouth and I had no control. I had gotten some sleep by then, so it wasn't sleep dep. I mean as soon as I set up camp I could finally rest. The sleep dep was over.

As a result of this being used like that I made a complete ass of myself.

So I also took on a new rule. My body. Go get your own, dammit. I've been pretty adamant about that rule. I can channel just like Hollywood, but... no. People are assholes and they don't like to get permission. It's not fair to anyone when that happens.